I was reading the tale (forgive the pun) of a blogger who was sent a calendar intended to motivate her exercise program, it featured a dog IN the dishwasher licking the plates! Interesting.
Which made me think of kara the wonderdog and her food obsession. Ive had to stop Kara getting into the dishwasher. Most of the time she is content to lick the scraps off the door, but then she works her way in a little bit more, and then she sees/smells the plates, oh then the bowls at the back are too tempting and before you can say omg she’s half way in, heh.. This is probably not the healthiest thing, but at least the filter is easier to keep clean! Fortunately she can and will eat anything, unlike some other poor miserable inbreds that cant tolerate anything that deviates from their prescribed diet. Our moderately large hairy bundle seems to vacuum up every scrap that she wills to fall on to the floor, and with two teenagers that have endless bottom pits who are challenged on the tidy scene, its more often than not. The rest of her adventurous day is spent sleeping in the kitchen dreaming of her endless food supply. What a life.
You believe every patient needs TLC: Thorazine, Lorazepam and Compazine.
You would like to meet the inventor of the call light in a dark alley one night.
You believe not all patients are annoying … some are unconscious.
Your sense of humor seems to get more “warped” each year.
You know the phone numbers of every late night food delivery place in town by heart.
You can only tell time with a 24 hour clock.
Almost everything can seem humorous … eventually.
When asked, “What color is the patient’s diarrhea?”, you show them your shoes.
Every time you walk, you make a rattling noise because of all the scissors and clamps in your pockets.
You can tell the pharmacist more about the medicines he is dispensing than he can.
You carry “spare” meds in your pocket rather than wait for pharmacy to deliver.
You refuse to watch ER because it’s too much like the real thing and triggers “flash backs.”
You check the caller ID when the phone rings on your day off to see if someone from the hospital is trying to call to ask you to work.
You’ve been telling stories in a restaurant and had someone at another table throw up.
You notice that you use more four letter words now than before you became a nurse.
Every time someone asks you for a pen, you can find at least three of them on you.
You can intubate your friends at parties.
You don’t get excited about blood loss … unless it’s your own.
You live by the motto, “To be right is only half the battle, to convince the physician is more difficult.”
You’ve basted your thanksgiving turkey with a Toomey syringe.
You’ve told a confused patient your name was that of your coworker and to HOLLER if they need help.
Eating microwave popcorn out a clean bedpan is perfectly natural.
Your bladder can expand to the same size as a Winnebago’s water tank.
When checking the level of orientation of a patient, you aren’t sure of the answer.
You find yourself checking out other customer’s arm veins in grocery waiting lines.
You can sleep soundly at the hospital cafeteria table during dinner break, sitting up and not be embarrassed when you wake up.
You avoid unhealthy looking shoppers in the mall for fear that they’ll drop near you and you’ll have to do CPR on your day off.
You’ve sworn you’re going to have “NO CODE” tattooed on your chest.
Well spaceshuttle blog we have lift off! Well at least a couple of centremeters at least, as two yeah TWO people other than my faithful friend – hi there Marg, have actually read my stuff! So that should keep me going for a couple more months! Well the heat is upon us now 32c and sooo humid, I am definitelty living in the wrong hemisphere. I would gladly swap the sweaty sarong here for a cashmere jumper in the cooler parts of the world. Today the dog chased a huge goanna up a palm tree beside the pool, that was exciting! Lucky for her it didnt bite her instead. We seem to have a reptilian refuge here, there is a lovely long black python that likes to sun itself on the rocks, and several other smaller snakes, one little black one came to visit on the back porch, which was promptly relocated on the broom to a safer spot. It keeps the dog on her toes, when she sticks her nose out the door, which is less often (never)! So while the ac is blasting away, I tried to spend some time trying out new blog layouts, but not really sure it was worth it, as it is a trial version so they paste little trial words across the page- not very good. But I did do some scrapping and have started the calendar, jan and feb are ok, march nearly done, april looking good, may and june under construction, should get it finished by the end of the year! unless something else becomes more interesting….
After 6 months of drought its finally raining! Our paddocks were as dry as a desert, but now thankfully are turning green again, our water tank is full and the pool overflowing! The weather is cool and pleasant for a change, I envy all those in the northern hemisphere, how I would love to frolic in your snow ! We have such a short winter season, its not fair, and as for snow we have to travel nearly 2,000 km to the alps which are beautiful but such a long way. Today is the perfect day to be starting another project so that is exactly what I am going to do, a scrapbook calendar sort of seasonal/ travel theme, I will post photos as I go, hopefully I will get it done before the end of the year! I found some inspiration on the web, and another blogger in the UK who is very creative, isnt the net amazing? Who would have thought we would have such a global network to link us all together. It never ceases to amaze me, but now i need to get going get scrappin’.
For those of you living in the civilised part of the world, new year arrived with a spectacular show of fireworks, Sydney put on an amazing show once again, choreograhed to music of the decade, I waited till 9pm for the kids show here but alas it was not to be! My friends were lying on the floor, sadly not drunk just incapacitated, while I anxiously peered out the window, in the end we gave up and went to bed, being tired old mother hens, and watched it on telly the next day! I also had the pleasure of watching a few child prodgidies on the Martha Stewart show, one little boy 6 years played Debussy on the piano, one of many, many pieces that he knew, and has composed many, many himself. The next boy is a financial guru at 13. yes, 13. Well I guess the makes me look preety damn stupid, when in my 4th decade still cant seem to balance the spreadsheet as well as I would like! So I guess it may have been a good thing to watch on the first day of the year, and make some sensible decisions from now on, when is the next flight to london?? Oh what not enough credit? again? bugger. No Im going to do some poitive stuff, maybe not huge but just the few things I keep putting off, so I think I will attempt to become a student once again, although one is always learning so they say, and as my smart bum son keeps telling me “you dont know anything”. Teenagers who needs them?